WEDDING VOWS-----WOWS AND WOES……………
Once upon a time, weddings in Surat were a simple, private affair. No’ Big B influence,’ just a ceremony to sanctify the couple’s confluence .The Sheri where the bride lived [since almost everybody lived within the walled city in those days] would be covered with a colourful ‘mandva’ that gave a rosy hue to the entire lane. So, the said street was officially blocked for two days……….
Day one would be a casual evening, where the family of the bride and neighbours would sing out traditional folk songs and apply mehndi, post dinner. The oldies would relax on ‘gadlas’,chewing away at their betel nut leaves, preening their eyes to see children, grandchildren and great- grandkids mingle.
Day two was the exciting part, where within a ‘mandap’ put up since the morning ,puja would be performed by the bride and parents.Then,the same venue would be done up in fresh, fragrant local flowers, with two’ sankheda’ patlas or chairs facing each other, ready for the wedding. Family members sat around it and blessed the newly weds. Traditional lunch , prepared by a maharaj,was served at an open’ wadi’ down the street .Invitees would eat out of disposable khakhar baaj and dadiyas, in turns which were called ‘pehli pangat’, ‘beeji pangat’ and so on. Sheri boys served Yummylicious food that included farsan, seasonal vegetables- lilva, undhiyu or panchkutiyu, daal, pickles. If the kids got lucky, there would be a sancha ice cream for dessert too, in addition of course, to the ace traditional delicacy- Lapsi.

As times changed, so did weddings and their venues .From Sheri to ‘nath ni waadi’ to present day ,where farm houses on the city outskirts are converted into places that resemble ‘Jumbo Circus’.Surti versions of fancy cuisine from around the world along with juices named’anarkali’ and’ toofani minty’, are served by a troupe of stiff, uniformed chaperones. Fake Flora and Fauna of impossible colours are put up all around in the name of décor!
Influenced by Sooraj Barjatya, Surti weddings have become week long’ affairs’ [literally]’.Guest lists too, read like ‘hum aapke hai kaun?’ Everyone is invited. The festivities begin with ‘sangeet’the official word for cocktails .Everybody that the bride/groom’s parents know gets to perform on filmy numbers, with clothes to match. Soon, the stage turns into a who is who? The happiest people in this ceremony are the boozers, huddled in a room, enjoying the alcohol as long as it flows. Also happy are the ‘begaani shaadi mein Abdullah deewana’types, who were invited because they were friends of the bride’s mother’s best friend, but now feel like family and circulate likewise.

Then, follow the Mehndi night, DJ night, and Bachelor/Spinster night etc.which are like fancy-dress dos. The unsaid rule for these though, is ‘BOB’ i.e. bring your own booze and find your own corner. Sometimes, unemployed artists from Mumbai grace these celebrations. DAY 6 is the ‘Mosalu’, a very personal ceremony with only 500 invitees, who get to ogle at part of family fortune being exchanged. Usually a day ceremony, where everybody is sober and sleepy. The elders love this one since they do not feel lost on this important day and get to have their say. Also, a day when everybody cries, for different reasons.
The Wedding and Reception are more or less similar, with the same 2500 people wandering about, clueless. By then, the Bride and Groom have had enough. Tired and weary, as they automatically smile at every face that appears in front of them. I also suspect they hate their designer gear by now. Poor souls, talk about an ‘unforgettable experience.
’Phew! I think that’s a wrap on weddings for this season .Now, I have to deal with the dilemma of my wedding wear not meeting a disastrous end at the dry cleaners. As I sort out what goes where, I realize how much I miss the ‘Sheri lagan maharaj ni khatti mithhi daal.’ Somehow, nothing in the world tastes as good as that did…………….