TRAFFIC SAFETY WEAK …ERR WEEK.
Tapi town was all geared up last week. Colourful events were organized, to make its denizens more aware on the serious issue of traffic rules.

The SMC ground besides Chowpatty garden, where Surtis normally enjoy their chatpata street food fare, was chosen as the flag off point.

The band played a solemn tune after which a pledge was taken by the brigade, to make sure that Surtis would be shown safety measures regarding local road travel.

At the crossroads that lead to the circuit house, a sweet voice sang out from a very bad quality speaker, attached to a pole outside the police booth.

Supposedly rendering an awareness song, this was probably penned by a wannabe police poet. It was sharp enough to bring normal traffic to a screeching halt.

The mascots for the event were a bunch of ugly, duplicated zoo zoos.

They looked scary, yet confused (in accordance to the theme, I was told).

Talented children were provided walls of medical and educational institutions to depict their ideas on the subject of road safety.

I hear the event was a huge success; huge amount of fines were collected to prove the same.

Unfortunately, unlike other towns, we Surtis face very different traffic problems. We require special training to combat the same and here are a few suggestions for the next traffic safety week-

The Logo-Karo ya maro.

The Mascot-An athletic looking Surti, in fancy sports gear.

The training programme-

1. Dirt bike racing-For skilled maneuvering over dug up roads that have long lost their cemented cover and provide uphill and downhill terrain within the town.

2. Golfing- The idea here is to have an eye for the potholes and avoid them instead, lest you want a ‘one in the hole ‘for your car tyre. (Promiscuous Surtis sit down and behave yourselves! This has nothing to do with your hero-Tiger)

3. Hundred meter hurdles-Our diversion signs have been so placed on the roads that it requires special skill to avoid them on one side and some jagged edge or vehicle on the other. Vehicles will need to hop, skip and jump for the same.

4. Fencing-As self defense against the cutting edge of our lord of the strings kite runners; pedestrians and bikers will need to master the art of special sword fencing .Thus, cut out chances of a slit hit.

5. Kickboxing-Auto rickshaws that are as jam packed as Trojan horses; with school bound children and slum bound labourers, have riders who specialize in foot signals. They need to be taught to kick a bit higher up so that the left/right signal indication for turns is more prominent.

6. River rafting-To help sail through gutter puddles and flooded areas of over flowing septic tanks and harvested rain water on the roads.

Special long jump and 100 mt.Sprint courses can be developed for pedestrians, who pop out of road dividers.

Also, juggling lessons on how to multitask and handle mobiles, FM channels and children while driving can be held too.

Readers can write in their suggestions, traffic police have assured that ‘prompt action will be taken.’

With present bridgeworks and storm water drainage development going on, the question now is,’ where are the roads?’

Tapi town tattle-Big B in Gandhinagar=Madhushala in Gujarat.