Bullet Battalion's Motorcycle Diaries .........va va vroooommmmmm!

                                     BULLET BATTALION’S MOTORCYCLE DIARIES


Get your motor runnin’, Head out on the highway

Looking for adventure and whatever comes our way ......


Steppenwolf’s classic number from Born To Be Wild is what could aptly descirbe Surat’s Bullet Battalion. For a team that was formed barely more than a year ago, this gang of bikers has covered more than 7000 kms countrywide.

“We began with a team of four guys and now have 20 members to our non- profit organization with no commercial interests.”Says Ravi Bhatia - one of the core members of BB since its inception. All members of Bullet Batallion own classic models of Royal Enfield that are either 350 cc or 500 cc and have a passion for hitting the highway for day rides, as well as indulge in long distance travel once every two months.

The Battalion is all for bike -buddy bonding and its members vary in their age group from 24 to 42 years. “Age is just a number, on our recent day trip to Wilson Hill in Dharampur, we had a 61 year old rider enthusiast from Valsad join us, and his Bullet was a 1971 model that zipped with zeal.”Says an engineer groupie, who prefers to remain incognito; the BB gang also has as its members’ businessmen and bankers who hum in unison, the feeling of Steve Earle’s song:

“Nowadays I got me two good wheels and I seek refuge in aluminum and steel

It takes me out there for just a little while and the years fall away with every mile”

In June last year, a few BB guys cargoed their bikes to Chandigarh and then set forth for a journey to Ladakh. “We practiced for four months before attempting to ride upto the highest motorable peak. It was a dream come true that got us motorcycle lovers very emotional. The route was scenic yet tough, it also had a 22 km stretch of sand that had us sweating even in minus degree temperature; but, every time we gave up on ourselves the road beckoned us invitingly, tempting us to tour on.” Says Ravi Bhatia.

Alongwith their yen for riding, they also developed the art of motorcycle maintainance hence they carry along clutch wires, tyre tubes, air pumps and are well equipped to handle minorbreakdowns. Helmets are compulsory; long distance rides require bikers’s boots and jackets that are armoured to protect shoulders and backs. Pure passion drives this battalion who feel while others are commuters, they are comrades hence they ride in a single line alignment, at 60 kph, and ensure that the fastest rider is at the end, each rider is responsible for the one behind him thus no one is left out.

While alternate Sundays are reserved for city rides to Suvali and Dumas, on the 27th of April, they plan to make the metal hit highway mettle to Mumbai and catch an IPL match.

BB rides and Kms:

Padamdungri 250

Saputara 350

Ladakh 3000

Dandi 110

Kutch 650

Gira Fall, Dang 250

Valsad 180

Wilson Hill 300

www.facebook.com/Bullet.Battalion

Alvida McBull Fida

Why M F Husain will live forever

‘Chund tasveerey butaan chund haseenoki khatut, baad marne ke mere gharse yeh samaan nikla’
(A few photographs and some love letters from my sweethearts is all that was found from my home after I died.)

Ghalib’s above mentioned couplet was among M F Husian’s favourites and now reads relevant, in his death. While life ended for him in exile, the painter who was perceived as India’s Picasso and awarded with highest honours like the Padmashree, Padma Bhushan and Padma Vibhushan, has left behind a vacuum in the art world that will never be reclaimed.

“He was a wonderful human being and I have yet to meet another of his caliber in my life. We had a long association. In 1999, during the production of Gajagamini, he was short of finances and I volunteered to work out the matter for him, he in turn, gave me some of the finest pieces of work. He loved sipping chai over which we shared fond memories. I was waiting for him to return to Dubai, was meaning to meet him soon, but alas!” reminisces Praful Shah, a connoisseur of Husain’s art and MD of Garden Silk Mills. The Garden Art Gallery in Surat was graded as one of the country’s finest by the artist when he had come to inaugurate it.Husain painted a scene from his childhood on a black canvas, holding the audience enthralled.

“Husain saab was a great philosopher, when he met my father and me, it was an absolutely unbelievable experience for us. My father expressed this thought aloud to which Husain saab replied, ’All of us build our individual karma, what goes around comes around .Our Karma pinds were destined to meet and hence, have we.” says VNSGU Professor of Art, Rajarshi Smart.

Surat’s renowned artist, late Jagdeep Smart, translated M F Husain’s biography in Gujarati – ‘Dadano Dangoro Lidho, Tene Toh Mein Ghodo Kidho’, named after a popular Gujarati limerick, it was co published in 2004 by Archer, Ahmedabad.

Written in Gujarati text to bring out nuances of, ‘Husain –Shailee’, Maqbool’s childhood, Husain’s artistry, Mc’s jovialness, Bull’s hidden grief and aggression (Husain often signed works as Mc Bull), M .F. Husain’s popularity and Fida’s volcanic love rush, translator Smart points out to the reader that he left intact Husain’s sentence formation, wordplay, Urdu verse so that the essence of the artist could flow to the readers.

Husain’s address to his own childhood reads: ‘O mara dost, mara balpun, taney aapna dadana ordani ae baari yaad chey ? Jemathi hu baharni duniyani nani nani vaarta o joya karta hata.Aapney joyu ghanu,janyu ochu’- O my friend,my childhood,do you remember that window in our grandfather’s room? From which we looked out at little itsy bitsy stories. We saw a lot, learnt little.’

Capturing Maqbool’s picturesque memory of ‘An earthen pot on a cot under the roof from which a silent lantern hangs ,a book below the pillow opened to page fourteen,a trunk of tin with two pairs of clothes,a dirty coloured blue shirt of a man,a broken chain from a bicycle,a velvety orange scarf,bamboo flute and a ring wrapped in fuchsia kite paper ’, to quoting Fida’s philosophy of, ’Modern art being a joyful labyrinthine of the fact that it gives the onlooker the right to perceive it with his own view and nature. Modern art’s nature is not royal but democratic. It looks like royalty; its lines proclaim self respect and its colours are luminous with pride.’

The book encases the very essence of Husain ,sketching out the artist’s meteoric rise from painting cinema hoardings to producing art cinema featuring his muse,Bollywood’s queen bee Madhuri Dixit in whom he envisioned his mother, his museum at Ahmedabad-Ahmedabad ni Gufa.While no one in the world can paint horses better than Husain,his favourite ride were bicycles.His cycle stuti philosophy read thus-’A cycle’s seat is a man’s head, handles two hands, pedals are feet, the boy (himself) sits on the carrier behind ,riding it seems as if the entire cycle is in his lap, or the boy is in the lap of the cycle. It can’t be said who is caring for whom cuddling the other in his lap.’

It enlightens the reader in the artists own words, about humble beginnings within Indore’s ‘naalawalu makaan’,to the cheeky ‘Bapuni shaadi ma beto diwaano’,from the nostalgic ’Dadanu achkan’ to joy filled ‘Vadodrani boarding school’ where his teacher helped him enact a Persian couplet-

‘Kasbe kamaalkun ki azeezat jahaan shavi/Kasbe kamaal niyarjad azeezey mann’-

‘One who has cultivated proficiency in arts and crafts is loved by all. But one lacking in those skills can never ever win hearts.’

A lesson that India’s finest artist preached not only in his life but also in death.

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/surat/Caged-Surtis-flap-on-Facebook-for-airport/articleshow/8325982.cms

Mirza Ghalib's Shagird -Sayyah

MIRZA GHALIB’S SURTI SHAGIRD

  Nestled within the hustle bustle of the area known as Badekhan Chakla, is one of Surat’s heritage monuments - Khwaaja Daana Saheb’s Dargah.The Mausoleum of a famous saint who traveled from Agra to Baroda to Surat in the 15th century .Just as all rouzas do, this place provides for peace and quiet to staunch believers who come here to pray and pay respect. 

Circumferential to Khwaja Daana Saheb’s place of rest are various other tombs, those of his direct descendants. One among these is that of Nawab Gulam Baba Khan, a patron of Delhi’s great poet Mirza Ghalib. Next to him, is buried Sayyah-one of Ghalib’s favourite students. Although the renowned poet never visited Gujarat, he kept in touch with Gujarat’s Mirs via his wonderful letters.

 ‘Qasid ke aatey aatey khat ek aur likh rakhoon,main jaanta hoon jo who likhenge jawaab mein’ 

Ghalib tutored the glamour of Urdu grammar to many students through his impeccable penmanship and was particularly fond of Mian Dad Khan, bestowing him the pen name ‘Sayyah’, meaning traveler.Ghalib penned him thirty-five letters from 1859-1869, discussing various topics. Sayyah was a courtier at Nawab Mir Gulam Baba’s palace and it was he who introduced Ghalib to this patron.Ghalib loved to travel but in absence of good health and apt means, it was Sayyah who corresponded to him about various places in India where he traveled to.

 In the book Mirza Ghalib and the Mirs of Gujarat, author Mir Jaffar Imam shares the letters Ghalib wrote to Sayyah.The beauty of Ghalib's prose was equal to that of his verse.The personal letters written by Ghalib during his last years to the kith and kin of author Mir Jaffar Imam,show Ghalib's most vulnerable and sentimental profile.

One of them reads thus when translated- “Well if I cannot travel, I’ll content myself with the thought that ‘to hear of pleasure is to experience half of it.’ So let me enjoy the story of Mian Dad Khan Sayyah’s travels and tours.” 

Syed Zahiruddin Madani who wrote ‘Sukhanrvarne Gujarat’ mentions how Sayyah was a connoisseur of elegant and well stitched clothing and ordered the same from Delhi; he also had a penchant for perfumes and collected various ittars from around the country.Once, Mirza Ghalib sent him six caps like the one he wore himself but Sayyah gave them to Gulam Baba, wearing none himself. 

Sayyah’s luxurious lifestyle and extravagant habits led to his involvement with some people of dubious character, who printed counterfeit currency. Once, Sayyah used a counterfeit Rs.100 note at the Victoria Terminus and was sentenced to fourteen years upon getting caught but, was pardoned and set free when he wrote a verse in the honour of Queen Victoria’s jubilee celebrations. 

Although a Diwan of Sayyah ‘s works is not available, he published a book ‘Saire Sayyah’ in 1872, which was a travelogue featuring his visits to mushaiyaras in cities such as Hydrabad,Mysore,Madras,Delhi,Meerut,Lucknow,Banaras and so on. The book ‘Lataaif-e-Ghaibi’ written by Sayyah is credited to Ghalib who many scholars believe was its original writer.

 ‘Khat likehnge garche matlab kuch na ho/Hum toh aashiq hai tumhare naam ke’

 In his book ‘Surat sonani murat’, author Ishwarlal Desai has described how Ghalib and Sayyah shared a unique father and son relationship.Ghalib mostly referred to him as ‘Barkhurdar’,or ‘Munshi sahab ‘or ‘Dost’. Ghalib and Sayyah both shared the grief of losing several children none of whom survived beyond infancy. The Ustad consoled his shagird through his letters and related to his irreplaceable loss.

He conferred Sayyah with the title’Saif Ul Haq’ (the sword of God) and wrote to him”By giving you the title, I have appointed you the commander of my army. You are my hands, you are my arms, you will be the weilder of the sword of my speech.” Proud of being his ustad’s favourite, Sayyah once wrote “The shadow of grace of Ghalib has graced me, what matters if the wings of Phoenix do not bless me with their shadow.”

He further penned with great pride, “Hai talmaz Assadullah se humko Sayyah, shaayaro mein ho na kyun fakhre madar apna”

http://www.timescrest.com/society/coolie-number-1-4814

RESPECTED VIP, KINDLY RSVP

Dear VIP (very important politician),

Heartiest congratulations mister minister, from all us Surtis of this sparkling diamond city! Your contribution to our town has been quiet unequivocal and praiseworthy, in lieu of which you have been chosen to inaugurate our eighth flyover.

Built at a cost of Rs.59 crore, this 962 meters long piece of architecture is ‘Hors de prix’-priceless, because of the fact that not only did we uproot our signature mini Eiffel tower for it but also that denizens of an age group that ranges from kids upto the ready to kick the bucket kind, residing around it went through several sleepless nights so that it could be constructed in good time.

Many a night, beyond 1 a.m in the mornings, when the noise got unbearable and disturbed ailing elders, board exam students, pregnant mothers to be, newly born infants and us all, most of us dialed 100 to place a complaint at the Umra police station in vain, as we were promptly told to grin and bear the drone till the wee hours of the morning since, “flyover publicna sukh maatey baney chey, jetlu jaldi bani jay, public ne laabh thay.”(The flyover is for the benefit of the public, the earlier it is constructed, the better)

While the citizens of this area have sacrificed their sleep and are waiting to exhale with a sigh of relief to breathe easy, there are other Surtis who have sacrificed sweat,burnt petrol and boiled blood while trying to maneuver their vehicles with extreme difficulty on the rain ravished pot holed single track lanes, desperately awaiting the flyover to take over the problem of saving precious time, if not kilometers by smoothly branching out traffic.

School buses and the bachha brigade that rides on them are looking forward to return home earlier, Ambulances and fire brigade rescuers hope to reach their destinations faster, travelers to and from the airport where the lone flight arrives and departs during busy traffic hours within the town are looking forward to the brisk connectivity, as are railway passengers who will be able to access the station sooner. Surtis, who regularly saunter out on Sundays in search of the Arabian Sea, are looking to fly high over Parle Point’s first and only flyover that exists in this part of the town.

Since Diwali, we await the inaugural of the same and while officials are still non committal about the D date, we are sure you would know better about the reason why the same has been indefinitely delayed and postponed.

We Surtis are known to treat our guests like gods-Atithi Devo Bhav is our motto and out of habit, we shall tend to tempt you with our winter goodies such as Undhiyu, Ponk and Salempak.

Kindly take this request in right earnest and request your office to provide you a date so that you may grace the occasion of the Parle Point flyover’s inauguration with your august presence this December, so that we may all have a happy new year.

Truly, your sincere Surtis.

P.S.-While we make the best hosts, the average Surti does not care who takes the credit of this bone of contention between man and minister, because the priority here is about facility to, for and by the public, which was the original purpose. With our past record of inaugurating the Amroli bridge by ourselves and the present rumor of a Facebook campaign to walk over the flyover, hurry before we banish the barricades!

MAD MAN’S TRIANGLES-SURTI STUFFINGS.............
Lest the title scares you, bringing to mind some eerie place like the Bermuda triangle, let me assure you, in Surat, weird names mostly stand for its people or food.
Little did Akshay Kumar know, when he gallantly sang out ‘Jab tak rahega samose mein aalu, tera rahunga o meri Shalu’, that Surti samosas have anything but potatoes in them.
Dough wrapped fried dumplings are very popular in Tapi town. Our Ghanchi and Khatri brothers and sisters excel in conjuring up innovative delights to make the same a pleasure on the palate.
Discover tastes that will tickle your taste buds..........
‘Fataka’ is what gram dal samosas are better known as in Surat. Sautéed with mint, ginger-chilli paste and onions this Surti speciality is available in three different degrees of spice levels.One is a mild, sober taste, the other with a sweet base of raisins while the third is all out on slurplicous spice . Chana dal samosas are sell outs at Nanavat-Gandabhai’s samosas who is the ace of the base in this field since ages; Jain samosas are also a variety popularly sold here.A smaller, milder version of the same are available outside the Syndicate bank, Salabatpura. On Kotsafil Road, above Jyoti plywood, a home run business caters to regulars who buy raw or semi fried versions of these triangular treats.

Bhamardiwala at Khangar Sheri, Salabatpura has the ‘Mastery’, as Surtis put it, in preparing succelent Suran [yam] samosas. Amongst the few who do so in town, it’s a task rarely practised. Yam is first grated, washed and then dried, later sautéed with dry, hot spices and green chilli to make a filling that resembles and tastes like mutton kheema. By the way, mutton samosas are also a speciality prepared to order and unlike the heavy, fried variety available at Chowk, in the by lane that leads to Sonifalia and Sardar museum,Bhamardiwala’s sell a ready to fry version that can be relished hot at home.

At Bibiniwadi, Syedpura, green pea samosas -tempered with curry leaves, cashews, cottage cheese and desiccated coconut are an exotic tropical flavoured filling. Made exclusively by the oil pressers, the Ghanchi community, it is a spicy -sweet delight amidst flaky plain flour pastry.

Innovative stuffings like soybean, sautéed Chinese vegetables and cottage cheese chewies have enthusiastic takers at Anand Mahal Road, near Prime Arcade. The samosa Pattis for these are made from whole-wheat flour.

Suburban Surtis meanwhile, relish the scrumptious taste of Rachna‘s tasty treats at Ghoddod road. The most expensive in their league , the cheese samosas are an exclusive variety from a secret recipe that was handed down from a home in Singapore, by a Surti N.R.I. Also available here are Mexican samosas packed with bean, corn and spring onions.
Surti samosas vary in crispiness according to their shells- from chewy, crispy to gritty.
Pyramid like savouries that now have a commercial existence, originally prepared by experts, within kitchens of Surti homes.

Tapi town tattle-Swine Flu-Kamina fever.

SUREFIRE SURTI VISAPOWER....................
In wake of the most powerful man in Gujarat being denied authorization to enter the U.S of A, there is hearsay that Gujarati Diaspora are on the hunt; apparently, they are looking for the person who granted Bush and allies visa to Iraq.
People are also saying that some sentimental Surtis in Washington, supposedly protested outside the White House singing Altaf Raja’s classic,’Tum toh therey pardesi, saath kyaa nibhaogey?’But the White House feigned ignorance.
Rumours are rife around Tapitown that certain social service groups have pulled up their socks to publish pamphlets that give important tips on how to obtain visa; for the benefit of non Surtis.
The visa pamphlet will be state of the art, after all VIPs will be reading it. Obtaining a visa, particularly to America is as easy as apple pie for us Surtis. Most of our town and hundreds of villages under its jurisdiction have family or friends residing there through sheer Surti skills. Looks like the Surtis are hell-bent on proving that one need not be a rocket scientist or score an aptitude excel to procure an endorsement from the land of uncle Sam. Anyone can get one.Errrr........well, almost.
Speculation is soaring that there might be a Surti survey, asking us to pool in our thoughts and ideas too. A little bird told me that the‘kabootarbaaz clan’ will even be paid for sureshot tips.For the benefit of Non-Surtis [who will need the tips], the pamphlet is supposed to be printed in a bilingual format; Hindi and English. I have for you an exclusive sneak peak on a few of the tips that are proposed for printing..................
In English it will say’ Visa power-Go get it.’ The Hindi one is’ Kabootar ja ja-Dhoondtey reh jaogey.’
1.Dhandhey pey dhyaan do-First of all, officially change your surname to Patel.Next,prepare a blue print of a motel and a proposal for setting up one .Name any remote location in America where you want to set it up, there are never enough motels in the U.S..Visa provided -10 years.
2. Mein bhi Madonna-Join a singing and dance troupe for the upcoming Navratri festival.Enroll yourself for singing classes and render out a ‘sanedo’ in the visa office. Make sure they stamp on ‘granted’ before they run for cover thinking it’s an audio terror attack. Visa term -3 months.
3. Bhavna o ko samjho-Arrange a mock marriage with your visiting friend, cousin or stranger from the U.S., take along enormous wedding picture album for authenticity. Make sure you have the mehndi pics too. Yankees love tattoos. Visa power-green card nominee.
4. Chak de kamaal-Organise a team of players who play lakhotis, gillidanda and ambli pipli.Tell the authorities you need to create worldwide awareness towards these sports for official entry to the 2012 London Olympics since Gujarat has no representative for the same, yet. Visa permit-6 months.
5. Dur Darshan-Say you need to attend an international seminar of an Indian guru gyaani.Since tickets are not available for national ones and Indian electronic media is advising ‘baba-darr, shun’. You will also tour to visit temples abroad and throw in a trip to the Grand Canyon on your to do list; never mind if you end up going to Vegas instead. Visa wish-1 year.
6. Bachey budhey aur jawan-A popular one for family transfer; Gather neighbourhood kids, adults ,oldies and prepare an invitation of cultural inter school camp/medical treatment camp/Disneyland trip. More the merrier also has added benefit of a free ticket. Visa required-2 weeks [often self converted to lifetime]
Unfortunately, our esteemed chief minister cannot avail any of the above tips. He is a famous figure and a CM, not a common man. Since 2005, he is being sanctioned only a VC [video conference] and not a visa.
Tattle from a loose tongued Dallas Surti last week was that he had heard that American Gujaratis might shift the Chalo Gujarat celebration venue from U.S. to China next year.
Then there was word from the educated New York Surtis that all important Gujarati NRIs might visit Gujarat next year.’ What is that one about the mountain going to Mohammed?”They asked.
Many Surtis now feel that in future,our CM should refuse to visit America. Even if they roll out the red carpet for him and allow him a bumper diplomat package deal, he must deny the desire. It is said Surtis are very hurt; by repeatedly denying permit, they feel Washington has violated his human right, the right to an American visa.
For,when it comes to visas or permit, Surtis maintain,’Haq se maango!’

IDES OF MARCH…TIDES OF TROUBLE……..
The Ides of March stand for the first day of the Roman lunar calendar.15th of March, the day that dear old Julius Caesar was asked to beware of and assassinated on. Down the ages, this date is one that resonates doomsday for the superstitious just as Shakespeare had warned; a fore bringer of misfortune, according to many soothsayers.
In present day, our Surti Lalas got a taste of the Ides of March throughout the month. It has been a relentlessly cruel month for them………..

As the month began, a staggering stock market and the sensex knocked the senses out of both the sexes who locked more than horns, as the Bears and Bulls saw red. Dabba traders got tinned by the city police, real estate prices plummeted and diamond traders got singed by the scorcher of the share market’s Holi pyre even as Surti housewives blew up family money set aside to retire. In a town where cash is perennially in flow, liquidity saw many a dry day.

The textile sector got a blow by the FM [Budget, not radio silly!] with no relief to old woes. An 8 % addition of excise duty on imported weaving machines turned ‘TUF into tough’ for the weavers. Thus, spelling days of doom to Lalas who own power looms. With global competition warming up, prospects of growth seem bleak at present for Tapi town weavers who were set to go the long haul in upgrading their technology.

Tax evaders who are in the trade of property, diamond and textile have had a long, difficult month. Most of them were actually given the Ides of March i.e. March 15th.as the last day to cough up the indigestible tax returns. I-T officials seem to have hitched the Lalas, hook line and sinker; leaving no nook or corner for escape. VAT evaders ki toh vaat lag gai! With the Fiscal deadline fast approaching for this financial year, there were chaotic queues at offices of the revenue department as Surtis endlessly lined up and set their records straight to avoid being penalized later.

As though all this was not enough, the Jantri’s Jantar Mantar took the town completely unawares. Surat’s Bahumaali Bhavan turned into a clubhouse as the public, police; lawyers and bouncers tussled over equal rights of registration and decided to ‘go to the mattresses’- a la Godfather. Stamp paper demands caused a stampede. Amongst all the hungama, many stories unfolded along with the sleepover ka saman and hot tales arose along with the Tiffin box lids which Surtis came equipped with. The event also brought together snooty socialites from Parle Point to rub shoulders with the humble hasinas of Varachha, as most Surtis register their property in the name of the fairer sex. Lalas had to line up in person for once to officially register property in the proper way. Not being used to function without corruption, many Surtis unnecessarily slipped in extra currency with the registration amount, in hope that it would earn them an upgraded registration [or so they thought]!

Thus the scorching summer has begun with most Surtis in a soup. For once, March ending will bring a sigh of relief to Tapi towners. Hopefully, the month of April will bring in happier times. But, do watch out dear Lalas, because the new month begins tomorrow with April Fools Day! Here’s wishing you a happy one.