From Bhuj to Bonhams

Breathtaking art on silver artifacts by Bhuj silversmith Oomersi Mawji, adorns world’s most prestigious mantelpieces.

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 O M BHUJ  claret jug profusely decorated with animals and birds .It has a lion crushing a hare on its lid and a snake snake being charmed up a branch by a snake-charmer playing his 'been' as its handle Pic:Bonhams

Silver gilt presentation trophy from private collection of Wynyard Wilkinson said to have been presented to Lady Wynford by the Kutch Maharao Pic;Bonhams.

 Sketch of Oomersi Mawji at work by Percy Brown

Causing a stir at an upcoming exhibition at Bonhams, London ,is a spectacular pear shaped claret jug in silver, elegantly ornamented with repousse work, a serpent entwined around its handle. Crafted in Gujarat’s Bhuj during the late1800’s, this piece-de-resistance is ready to go under the hammer on 2nd October and is one amongst ten lots that are estimated to sell for £40,000 to £ 70,000 in total. Alice Bailey,Head of Bonhams Indian and Islamic Department ,comments, ”This ewer is a stunning example of O.M. craftsmanship at his best. This presents a rare opportunity to collect an outstanding piece by the most celebrated Indian silversmith. Another O.M. work was recently acquired by the Museum of Fine Arts, Virginia which is currently displaying it.”


Considered ‘the greatest silversmith of the 19th century ‘by connoisseurs of art, the works of Oomersi Mawji of Bhuj are objects of much desire in the global art collectors circuit. Mawji’s works have found shelf space at the world’s greatest museums for art and design .London’s Victoria & Albert Museum holds his classic tea set, Musee Guimet at Paris boasts of a cobra water jug designed by him, Harvard’s Arthur M Sackler Museum prides in a Kutch rose water sprinkler. Custom made to order, with his signature that reads O.M. BHUJ, Mawji’s magnificent trademark designs include ecological elements from Bhuj’s topography, flora and fauna. Oomersi created dramatic designs in unsurpassable repousse relics decorated with a network of profusely scrolling vines, motifs of Indian animals and birds, especially the Sarus ,were at times incorporated with exotic elements such as tiger’s claws, wild boar’s teeth, elephant tusks, mother-of-pearl.


Born to a family of luhars in Bhuj sometime around the 1840’s,Oomersi grew up to prove true the popular Indian saying ‘Sau sonar ki,ek luhar ki’( a blacksmith can achieve in one blow what a goldsmith needs to work a hundred upon ). His distinct talent at designing soon gained him the enviable position of royal court silversmith to Kutch Maharao Shri Mirza Raja Sawai Khengarji Bahadur Nod, founder of the oldest museum in Gujarat. Silver was imported to Kutch from Africa in those days of maritime trade and in the absence of tax levied upon the same, many artisans indulged in designing it for global export. Describing the Kutchi technique of designing silver, C.W. London in ‘Arts Of Kutch’ informs how Kutch silversmiths deftly smoothened and then lined with mercury and sliver the insides of objects with repousse detailing, which requires to be beaten from the reverse side to produce a raised design. For details on the outside which required hammering, the object was filled with resin wax which helped strengthen it with a solid core.Once the piece was ready ,the object was heated and the wax poured out. The artifact was then cleaned with a mild nitric acid solution ,burnished and then polished to sparkle.

While India’s princely rulers commissioned surahis(water jugs) attar-daans (perfume containers),paan-daans (betel boxes),gulab-pash(rosewater sprinklers)and hookahs in silver,the British Raj brought opportunity to manufacturing more modern ware such as tea services,claret jugs,wine decanters,salt cellars,pepper pots and trophies gilded in silver,travel flasks.

Mawji ‘s earliest available work designed on English watermarked paper dates 1863.He drew his designs on paper first as a guide for himself and exhibit for his clients. Gaining immense popularity via his exquisite work, Oomersi attracted the attention of the Maharaja of Baroda who became his chief patron. Mawji and his sons later shifted to Baroda and thereafter signed their work as O.M.Baroda.

From the 1860’s through the firm’s last years in the 1930’s, magnificent designs by Oomersi Mawji and Sons managed to create market for Kutch silver on an international scale. Kutch silver was sold at Liberty of London in 1885 and exhibited prominently in India and Europe. In 1903, at an Indian Art Exhibition, Delhi, artifacts designed by Oomersi Mawji were priced at Rs.1,515 for a vase,Rs.359 for a bowl and Rs.200 for a card tray. Rukmani Kumari Rathore, specialist at Indian Art, Bonhams says,” Indian silver is very collectable at the moment.There has been a lot of interest in silverware from the workshop of Oomersi Mawji especially items with an interesting history and good provenance.O.M items have done well at auction recently.On the 24th of April 2012, at Bonhams last Islamic and Indian sale, O.M.’s silver tea set in the form of three birds sold for £25,625 “

Ladies Vs Men With Mean Machines

Ladies Vs Men With Mean Machines


Apropos the luxury car frenzy that has taken Laladom by storm; no, tell me really, what is it?

The dictionary explains the word ‘vehicle’ as a means of conveyance that takes you from point A to point B. That could be your average BMW, but then again, it could also be a bicycle, or a bullock cart, no?

So then, whats all this honking fuss about, huh?

Do you think people judge you for the kind of person you are by the Mercedes you are seen in?

I mean, do these four wheel drive SUVs make you feel more towering?

Does that place the intellectual corporates in those boring sedans a little lower?

Robert Doisneau

So,if you have a BMW and your friends own a Skoda Superb or Laura or an optra by Chevrolet ,you are their big daddy,huh ?
What about the guy who has an Audi SUV but in a lesser priced model, what rung is he on?

And, according to that logic, does that mean that anyone who owns Bentleys is way above your league?

What about guys who don’t own any cars? Does that mean they are beyond competition?

How does one spell the name of your car again? Don’t know? Okay can you pronounce Volkswagen?

Doesn’t the word EMI actually translate to ‘living in borrowed heaven ‘?

Why do worry and ask about the mileage, petrol/diesel, when you are more than willing to chip out a fortune on your Land Rover?

And after spending all that indecent amount of money, why do you spend a whole load of more for a fancy number on its plate? Isn’t the Hulk of a car noticeable enough to have its distinct identity?

Why do you test drive models in maximum overdrive even as the salesman chews on his tie when you treat your own car as the most delicate darling on earth?

You tend to complaint that we mull way too much over our shopping then why do you take a lifetime before selecting ’the one’?

Why do spend lakhs of rupees on something that your polyester clothed chauffeur is going to drive?

Any clue whether your car is a front wheel, rear wheel or all wheel drive?

What makes a second hand celebrity owned car that has run more than 40,000 kms and has attended more parties and has been more photographed in its lifetime than you will ever be in yours more valuable than a brand new one that makes you feel like a star?

Does proximity to all things beautiful make you feel better about yourself?

What exactly do you mean when you drool,”What ae booty!”

Why do you forget your wife/girlfriend is a person and the car is a thing; not vice versa?

For those rare few who beg to differ from the question above; why on earth do you then comment on their backsides similarly?

You actually believe ‘aaja meri gaadi mein baithja’ is a great pick up line, don’t you?

What is so sexy about a huge, wide, room of a car that blocks and jams the entire traffic on Ghodod road at any time of the day?

What exactly are you hinting at when you ask for the one with ‘more leg space and spacious back’?

Does the big car’s engine seem to increase your horsepower vroom, you think?

What about the new ones that have an equally powerful engine as the Honda sedan in a more compact body like the Nissan Micra? Is it because Ranbir Kapoor advertises the latter?

Why is it that the smaller hatch back is presented to the women in the house as ‘ladies car’?

Why does your heart undergo a stress test every time your wife takes your car for a spin?

Why do you call the smartly designed small cars like Brio, a ‘tukda’ or ‘Hondi’, nickname Santro, Swift and Ritz as stunted growth and consider i10, nano and Zen as toys?

Why do company logos matter so much if all those like Jazz, Liva and Asta i20 are branded and priced equally?

Why do you cover your steering wheel in leopard print and turn the dashboard into a flashy wooden finish to instantly give away your identity?

With all your business sense, why do opt into investing in something that will instantly lose 20-30% of its market value the minute you drive it out of that showroom ?

You do know that if we spent that kind of amount, it would be on the kind of jewellery that would be custom made and one of its kind’s classic and that it would be an asset not a liability?

Wouldn’t a Vintage be a wiser buy?

What are you without your car?

Surat's Legendary Namesakes

Call it co-incidence or otherwise, but every place in the world worth going to has another place by the same name ;Surat being no exception to this law of tourism, has a town in Thailand named similar to it –Surat Thani which also has a river Tapi flowing by ,if you please. The province which means ‘city of good people’ was thus called by King Vajiravudh –Rama VI only as recently as 1915. Our good old Tapi town on the other hand, has been known as Surat since ancient ages and has more than one tale attached to the reason it is so called.

How did the name ‘Surat’ come about? Whom is the city named after? What does its name mean? Historians and poets through the ages have pondered over these questions much before you and I did; which has caused speculation regarding the same to run rife in books penned long ago. Some suggestions abide by historic happenings others are merely inspired by local folklore, but, all make interesting stories behind the raison d’être of Surat’s name.

Surat Itihaas Darshan Vol I informs readers that the word ‘Surti’ has its first written reference in an essay ‘Kahanadde’(1456 A.D), which mentions Khambhat and Rander as well. Surat finds its first mention in Jain scriptures dated 1478 .Tapi Puran which is believed to have been written during the 16th century mentions the river as being Suryaputri –the Sun god’s daughter and hence the town was called Suryapur .Ancient texts also mention numerous prayer rituals which were carried out as a salute to the Sun from here and the religious importance attached to the same.

Poet Narmad’s take on the town’s namesake theories are as varied as his works and laced with a certain romance. One of his stories goes that Surat was so christened by Khwaja Safar Suleimani aka Khudawand Khan who built the Castle .Narmad suggests that the town is named after Khan’s amour with a lady named Surat. Another one of Narmad’s fables speaks about a trader named Rumi from Constantinople who fell in love with a concubine called Surtha, she belonged to the harem of the Emperor of Turkey. Both escaped the wrath of the royal rage and sailed out into the sea. They arrived on the shore of Tapi opposite to Rander and set up the trading port with the permission of Gujarat’s sultan. Rumi met with great success thereafter and named the town Surat after his lady love.

Surat also has its share of royal stories that suggest that it has been named after kings. One of them reads that the king of Kamrej had land measuring 1400 vinghas here which had 14 wells. Kavi Narmad tried to find all 14 and is believed to have listed 10. The Bhagwad Golmandal Kosh states that the owner of Surajwadi was Sursen, an heir of the king of Kamrej and that our town has been named after him. Author Ishwarlal Ichharam Desai has written in ‘Surat Sonani Murat’ that Surat was named as the capital of King Surath who has been mentioned in a text named ‘Govind Das Erakrchara’penned by Govind Das,a disciple of Chaitanya Mahaprabhu.
French traveller Anquetil Du Perron of Paris, who visited Surat in 1758 mentions in his travelogue that a popular folklore here is about a prominent fisherman called Suratji Mahigir. A leader who protested against the Portuguese attacks and urged the Sultan of Ahmedabad to have a strong castle built to protect the locals. According to Perron, Surat was named after Suratji.

While some believe that the town was named after Malik Gopi’s mother Suraja ,historian Mohan Meghani informs readers via his book ‘Solmi sadi nu Surat’ about the folk lore of trader Malik Gopi who built Gopi Talav and set up the town as a successful trading port .Legend goes that he inherited immense wealth from a beautiful nautch girl named Suraj whom Gopi’s widowed mother served as house help. Suraj willed all her wealth to Gopi and later left for Hajj, never to return. Upon achieving great success as a trader and the title of Malik in 1515, Gopi called for Brahmin to name the trading town and suggested they name it ‘Suraj’, as a tribute to the generous lady who had left him her entire fortune. The reigning Mughal Sultan Muzzafar Shah however thought it would be inappropriate to name the town after a courtesan and suggested the word ‘Surat’ instead.

Suraa is the Arabic word used to mention every stanza of the Holy Quran and the Indian Muslim version of the same is known as Suraat.

Surat’s Celebrated Tonsorial Artist: Tom

Surat’s Celebrated Tonsorial Artist: Tom

‘Oh, Surat!’
‘Let us ask the first old Indian one can meet, soldier or civilian, where he was the happiest, and which he thought was the pleasantest station in the whole of Bombay Presidency?
His answer will be immediate-“Oh Surat! It was such a splendid city; the river was so fine, the commerce and shipping rendered it so cheerful, and the Moslem buildings were so magnificent; besides all that there was such good feeling in society –oh, there was never anything like Old Surat!”
And then, with garrulous delight ,the veteran hog hunter proceeds to dilate on the numerous ‘first spears’ he has taken ; on the pleasant picnics at Dumas and Vaux’s Tomb ; on the sporting songs of the celebrated Major Morris ,so often trolled forth in chorus from tents pitched upon the banks of the pleasant ‘Tapti’; nor does he forget to laugh once more over that character of fun and gossip ,that Figaro of the East ,Old Tom ,the Barber of Surat.’

When British ladies Marianna Postans and Marianne Young brought out their book on the Nawab of Surat in 1857, Tapi town’s introductory paragraph highlighted all of Surat’s delights which, as you may have noticed above, included the town’s favourite tonsorial artist, Tom.

Comparing him to Pierre Beurmachais’ Figaro-Le Barbier de Seville, albeit a little less mischievous, less dangerous but equally witty, lively and charming; the authoresses fondly note how everyone who had visited Surat in those days remembers Old Tom with a friendly feeling ,as an eccentric, peculiar character who brought many moments of entertaining chats to his customers .

It is a curious fact not generally known that this popular ‘hujjam’ (as locals called him) of Surat has been mentioned in many books which were published in the mid 1800’s by Britishers. So much so, that the Saturday Review on Politics vol 25 has its bunch of authors wondering why Sir Bartere Frere has devoted an entire page to Old Tom, in Old Deccan Days, which mentions him as,’ An ancient local celebrity named Tom the Barber whose vivid recollections of chronicles from former days could ill conceal the pride that he revealed them with.’

Everybody liked Tom and looked forward to his visits and varied tales as he went from house to house attending to the town’s elite. Described by different Europeans as a coiffeur with a swarthy complexion, about 45 years of age, clean shaven, with mischievous eyes, dressed in white linen, huge spectacles, small turban, a checked towel thrown carelessly over his shoulder, with a sheet sized cloth tied to his waist which displayed methodically arranged razors, soap box and pots of silver.

The resplendent paraphernalia exhibited around his abdomen consisted of his work tools inherited from his father, whose business he succeeded. Tom made sure everyone was well informed about the royal silverware’s history. Apparently the senior hair stylist had been gifted a shaving kit in pure silver by the Duke of Wellington who had honoured him with several sittings during his progress in the province of Gujarat.

Reputed to be an inquisitive and mendacious barber, who blended fact with fiction to present entertaining enchanting tales, Tom’s personal favourite was one about a sharp shooter who shot at earthen pots carried by women at the town well, with the pearl of his wife’s nose ring; but was killed in the battle by another good shot of a soldier who fired his gun for the first time.
Often a victim of his own success, he was much talked about by Tapi town’s tittle- tattle brigade. Upon remarrying a young and blooming wife, he was subjected to many cutting jests which were less witty but more telling than his own, but he chose to ignore them and exercised his vocation earnestly, blessing all his employers with a century’s age saying, “Mata pita make you hundred years old.”

As soon as any European arrived in Surat, Tom would call upon him at his lodgings requesting even heavily bearded and mustached men,”My Master, no let shave-let cut hair? Litt-lee long beard grow. Litt-lee six children and two wives die.Too much cholera.No let Tom cut hair-litt-lee .All sahib now no shave, long beard grow and Tom get no rupee.”
 George Waters recollects in his 'Indian Gleanings' how he perplexed the chatter box into silence by offering him his dog to be trimmed because his own beard was too dear to him. After a minute of silence, Tom indignantly stood up and saluting with his knavish style bid the sahib adieu, never to return again.

An old Surti saying goes,’visit a popular barber and you wont need to read the newspaper’. Maybe it was stemmed by the story of Old Tom-the superfluous hair-destroying artist of a sufficiently civilized society.

Surat's Proverbial Sixers

Surat's proverbial sixers

Most cities around the world have proverbial words attached to them that best describe their nature or law of the land. American author Henry Van Dyke once wrote ,“Oh, London is a man's town, there's power in the air; And Paris is a woman's town, with flowers in her hair; And it's sweet to dream in Venice, and it's great to study Rome;
But when it comes to living, there is no place like home.”

Amongst all other cities, Rome has so far been a favourite with writers. Often while watching a Hollywood flick or reading a book we come across lines like ‘All roads lead to Rome’, ‘When in Rome do as the Romans do’, ’Rome was not built in a day’, or to ‘Fiddle while Rome burns’ –The ideas behind these statements have always been ambiguous. As Oscar Wilde said, ’’The truth is rarely pure and never simple”; nothing could stand truer than the same for the origins of proverbs and idioms.

Even as Rome stands much celebrated worldwide, Surat and Surtis have their own set of old sayings; still oft quoted within its sheris and markets which visitors would fail to understand. Some are simple, others complicated but all share equally the distinction of being associated with the essence of Surat as a city.

You may have heard the most popular ‘Surat nu jaman ney Kashi maran’ that best describes the town’s lip smacking cuisine but a funnier one goes ,’Surat na vengan matey toh dev talsey chey’ meaning ‘Even the gods pine for Surat’s delicacies’.

Food has often been the forte of Surti proverbs .We have one which goes ‘Surat na suhvaala lok,nadi utariney meley ponk’ which talks of smooth Surtis and the good life they live by feasting on Ponk by the riverside. Another recommends,’Surat ni barfi ,Mathurana penda, Mumbai no halwo ney Khambhat ni sutarfeni.’

Then there are those sayings which glorify the city like ‘Surat sonani murat’, Surat sheher ney sunnani leher, Surat ni gat (speed)

Others still have been framed to hit it below the belt as well. Like ‘Surat sheher na lok,divasey boley ne raatey fok !’ meaning the Surti folks promise something by the day and go back on their word by night. You may have heard of ‘Delhi ka thug’ but Surat’s scoundrels are called’ Surti thug, haathma chattar ne gajvaama pathhar’ meaning Surat’s cheats hold an umbrella over the head but have stones in place of their wallets.

Smooth talkers are called ‘Surti ne vaat karey ullti’ which suggests Surtis are not straight forward but beat around the bush. Surtis have also been called ‘Surat na gaanda ney Bharuch na dahya, Surat na luchha ney Mumbai na maanda ‘while the former adjective describes Surtis as crazy the latter says Surtis are smart.

The jolly good nature of laid back locals is best described via ’Surya ast toh Surti mast’ –Surtis rejoice at sundown. Sethiyas are called ‘Surti ney Mangalmurti’ or even ‘Surat ney saheb ni murat’. Creditors were teased with ‘Multan kay Mallahji, Delhi kay Laaley; Surat kay Bhaisaheb, bheekh maangney ko chaley’

While all other proverbs are general in nature, the ones that describe the ladies of Tapi town are particularly distinct to their demeanor. On one hand they have been literally elevated on a pedestal in the saying ’Vadodra ni neechi naari ney Surat ni Paniyaari’ on the other there is an old couplet that goes ’Navsari ni nasaakhari, ney Bharuch ni bhatiyaari; Suratni toh aevi saari ,key khoon kariney kuttwa chaali’ meaning that Surti women are so crafty that they can get away even with murder.

An ancient entertaining ace penned long ago,which sketches out in general, the picture of Surti women who love to gossip remains true till date and goes, ’Gopipura ni gupp ney Chautey chaali chapachapp!’

Discovering Damao In Daman

DISCOVERING DAMAO IN DAMAN


Vasco Da Gama discovered the sea trade route to India in 1498, but the Portuguese discovered Daman only in 1523 and that too by default. India’s Viceroy D.Nuno da Cunha had ordered ships to set sail towards Hormuz; when the one carrying Diogo de Melo got caught in a huge storm resulting an off coast embankment on the Daman Ganga river.

Enchanted by the grandeur of the city’s port, Diogo brought it to the Viceroy’s notice. However, the Portuguese could conquer Daman only on 2nd February 1559, when Constanino de Braganza, the Governor of Goa, attacked the local Abyssinian defense of 3000 soldiers with a fleet of more than 100 vessels.

The Governor ordered a new, stronger fort –St.Jerome to be erected, strategically located at the harbour, just a stone’s throw from the town market and appointed Diogo de Noronha as Captain – Major of Daman, with a team of 1200 men .For 400 years since, the twin fort city remained under Portuguese rule, until Operation Vijay launched on 17th December, 1961 by the Indian Army, Navy and Air Force linked the territory to become an integral part of India.

Four centuries of Portugal’s influence gave birth to new customs and cultures and the locals went with its flow. Historians confirm the territory of Daman, known as the Northern Province, extended from Bulsar to Bassein ( Valsad to Vasai). The Portuguese masterminded export of Indian goods to foreign shores from Daman’s market. ‘Trade and finance in Portuguese India ‘, by Celsa Pinto points out how Daman and Diu derived their strength from Gujarat’s plains, noted for their fertile soil and agricultural productivity like cotton, centers of textile like Ahmedabad, Surat and Rajkot supplied woven fabric while lowlands surrounded by hills and jungles benefited for opium production and teak. Daman’s percentage of coastal traders was higher than the other two Portugal settlements of the Estado.

A paper written on Damao, by author Athos Fernandes for an international symposium,now published as a book on Goa-Portugal Their Cultural Links, informs readers about Portuguese domination in Daman - The first coin mint was established in 1617, when D.Lourenco de Tavora gave the license to mint copper coins known as bazarucos. The second and third mints came up on 1617 and 1769.Till date, locals often use the term ‘Num te bazaruco’- “I don’t have money.”

In 1773, the prime minister of Portugal announced that the shipyard at Daman-Caliana had done more than the entire maritime unit of Goa had achieved in a century. Christened Royal Shipyard thereafter, it made famous vessels like frigate ‘D .Fernando e Gloria,’ (19th century) which sailed for 33 years, transporting military personal from India to Angola, to Mozambique and back.

By the 19th century, Daman had its own newspaper -’O Portugues em Damao’, a weekly which began on 18th July 1835 and was so much in demand that it got distributed at night itself .Its editor was Prof.Solinas ,from Goa. Unlike the British who concentrated only on trade, the Portuguese were on a mission to spread religion and conversion. Churches, convents, colleges and seminaries sprouted up, beckoning neighbouring denizens. ’Our lady of Remedios’ at the Church in Moti Daman is believed to be a Hindu, one of the seven sisters of Goddess Laxmi, worshipped by seamen. .

Flavours of culinary cuisine such as espetada de leitao, pao-de-lo, alh –piment de bombilins,xacuti,dal bafad,dampaca, bacalhau and borao ,savoured with imported wines along with locally prepared bolo de sura-fermented sap of the palm tree found favour at local tables on festive days. Caravel dance and Portugal’s fado music retained immense popularity with the Damanense. Fishermen’s folk songs merged with local lore are still sung out at the sea.

Four hundred and fifty years since Daman was first influenced by the Portuguese, the impressions of its culture remain stamped all over the town. Last week, the Damanense celebrated World Daman Day on 2nd February, in nostalgia, sighing ,’Saudade Damao’and singing as Portuguese poet has penned in his collection ‘Mensagem’-

“O Mar Salgado, quanto do teu Sal Sao Lagrimas de Portugal !”

(Oh salty sea, how much of your salt are tears of Portugal!)

Corkage Charge In Tipple Town

Corkage Charge In Tipple Town


Surat’s most popular senior citizens-Mr.Magan Batla and aunty Batli held a, ‘Dampened Spirits Drive’ last evening.

It was in lieu of a protest against the arrest of the honourable city Mayor’s cousin brother and others, on charges of consuming alcohol in a public place (a Ghoddod Road discotheque, barely half a kilometer from Umra Police Station and just a hop, skip and jump behind the Mayor’s home, a backyard premises he has rented out).

It wasn’t an Alcoholics Anonymous meet, mind you, which surprisingly exists at large through the dry state, with Surat scoring the maximum number of members there too.

This was one where so called thinkers of Tapi town came together to discuss on a sober and serious note, the price and punishment that denizens are paying for prohibition.

On the promise that they remain incognito, anguished Surtis stated their quotes and views of the public in general.

“Prohibition has become the new weapon for vendetta in our town! Anyone can pick up the phone and complaint .There is no end as to how many ‘mehfils’ police raids will yield from homes, every single night.”

“Imagine what kind of names will tumble out if we apply via RTI to know who all have been arrested for alcohol consumption in Gujarat, so far?”

“Vat 69 ney vaat laga di!”

“My uncle is penning a new prohibition Kolaveri version called,” Why this hypocrisy, hypocrisy policy di, ho Modi!”

“Where is the booze coming in from? I read that bootleggers supplying to Gujarat have an annual turnover of 1500 crores!”

“Those are last year’s figures, now that the noose is tighter, rates might have doubled.”

“I always assumed that having an alcohol permit meant ‘License to drink’ but, my friends were sitting ducks and met their nemesis in an apartment when they were raided for drinking at home!”

“Dint this happen the same night as the one in which Parmeshwar Godrej’s party for Oprah was raided thrice by the Mumbai Pandus?”

“No, and stupid, Mumbai does not have prohibition issues, they were raided for causing commotion next to an MLA’s residence.”

“I am a teetotaler, yet, I pay more taxes because prohibition costs a loss of Rs.3000 crores of revenue to the government and I heard that they have to make up for it by hiking our basic taxes.”

“Aaprey toh kaee didhu, aapunney kaai pher parto nathi, lai javo ander,juo ! Bus,aapra bapa hudhi vaat nahi pahunchvi joyey ,whu ?”

‘I have decided to pen a book on it and name it “Night at Police Station; Nightmare at Civil Hospital”

“Surat’s police are trying really hard to brush off last year’s accusation of procuring the maximum bribes in the matter of prohibition. A leading weekly national magazine had summed it up to around 70 lakhs.”

“Can you imagine that wedding cocktail parties are now the main reason for Surtis to organize destination weddings? How do you expect us hoteliers to lose millions of rupees in this manner and still take it in the right spirit?

“The closest getaway is Daman, with the amount of spurious liquor flowing from there these days; you could have a river of elixir running through it!

“I hear after acing at duplicate Black Label, they now excel at aping single malts too, packaging and all!”

“Daru, daru, daru, daru, daru, daru, daru hic!”

“Can we please get back to the issue now? Do you know how distilleries are minting millions by shoving excise free booze into the state?”

“Also, hooch king pins are crorepatis here.”

“This is just a vote bank policy, in the name of Gandhiji.”

“Did you know that Gandhiji’s grandson had once stated on national television that, “There are many other things which Bapu stood for which we should be practicing, but which no one does. Prohibition in Gujarat is an industry which finances politics, politicians and police."

“How come having no prohibition in SEZ does not offend Bapu, but consuming alcohol in other areas of Gujarat does?”

“I think it’s the women in the state, who vote in favour of prohibition, whom politicians do not want to displease.”

“ Eni maaney !!!!!! ……….pun mari ni maaney !”