Weekday options for Sunday Papas

For all busy dads ,around the world

With the nostalgia of one more Father’s Day now behind us, Surti Lalas, whose business schedules have converted them into Sunday papas have reached to a tear jerking conclusion, resonating with the adage that they inherited from their fathers-
’ God gave us money but not time.’

Present circumstance and stress of an overworked and underpaid life make sure that children see their dads only on Sundays, when those precious few hours are mostly spent in dining out with friends or catching up on the latest flick.

Conversation is the key word while raising a child. We live in an age where the generation gap has been bridged, but communication gap within families has widened more than ever before.
In their book ‘Adolescence: The Survival Guide for Parents and Teenagers’, authors Elizabeth Fenwick and Dr.Tony Smith have pointed out that, "Although young children usually exchange thoughts and feelings quite easily, adolescents are not often so communicative. It takes a real effort to keep the channels of communication open with someone who is apparently determined to shut you out and to be as monosyllabic as possible. But it's essential to keep talking-and keep listening-if you are to survive your children's adolescence intact. If you can manage it, and are still on speaking terms with your adolescents by the time they reach their late teens, you'll find they may actually want to talk to you, and it's once again rewarding to have conversations with them."
Here are some fun ways to let conversation sneak in between your child and you, while you spend an hour extra with them, within your busy schedule.
Drive your child to school occasionally, make the effort to wake up early, share breakfast, drop your child to school .Chat up about friends, teachers and subjects, discuss fun incidents from your school days. Try and attend the parent teacher meeting whenever you are in town, learn first hand about your kid’s advantages and shortcomings to help understand her/him better.

Catch up over a surprise lunch or dessert .Play scrabble or chess at coffee shops .Plan a picnic .Discuss food preference with them. Explain cuisines or learn what they know about it, with interest. Your child probably knows the best thin crust pizza combo in town and can spell more pasta names than you. Pay full attention when your child speaks; stop doing everything else at that moment.

Visit your child’s extra curricular activity class. Whether its sports, music, art or dance, take interest, appreciate, if possible participate or have your kids teach you the technique they are skilled in. Children are friends with people who perform their favourite activities with them. . Learn to play ‘Super Mario’/ ‘Angry Birds’, on their gadget. Compete in healthy fashion.

Let your children visit your workplace for an hour or two. Treat them as adults as they watch how you spend your day at work. Ask for suggestions to know their point of view. Make them feel important. Show respect through both your language and demeanor. Don’t start giving advice when your child is asking you to listen. Don’t talk or do other things. Listen. End the conversation when your child is ready to do so, not when you are.

Children often send out the same message in different ways, when they are not understood.’ Remember that 70 to 80 percent of all communication is nonverbal. If you truly have an empathetic heart, you will always be reading the nonverbal cues.’ says Stephen R. Covey in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families. Read your child’s facial expressions, body language and non verbal clues. Understand that your child will not agree with everything you say.Respond, don’t react.

Time is your most precious possession and it’s all that your child needs.